Well, the time has come, we’re going to finish up eating the entire menu at Panda Express!
This has been an interesting food journey into an incredibly bland food experience where more things went wrong than right and I wasted a good chunk of my life sitting through that never-ending fucking red light at the mall intersection.
Okay, let’s go hit that Panda drive-through for one more time…with feeling!
To finish up eating the entire menu, we’re going to sample the Beijing Beef, The Wok-Seared Steak & Shrimp and a Chocolate Chunk Cookie from the dessert menu.
This is one of the few times that there’s been a line here at the drive-through, there’s two cars in front of me.
After a few minutes I placed my order and true to form there was a problem. I asked for extra hot mustard and was told that they were all out of hot mustard.
How the fuck does a Chinese restaurant run out of hot mustard? Oh well, at least they stayed on track for fucking shit up.
I realze there’s other routes I could’ve taken to avoid this fucking never-ending red light, but to tell the truth, I kept coming back for the sport of it. And I’m not really sure what that means, but I don’t think I’ll ever stop at this intersection again as long as I live.
Goodbye cruel intersection!
Here we are back at the new and improved MBIP World Headquarters Kitchen and Tasting Area. And if I ever get all my shit put away, I’ll give a tour of the new headquarters!
Luckily I have two packs of hot mustard in the collection. I usually put two in each entree, but one will have to do this final week of eating Panda Express.
How the fuck does a Chinese restaurant run out of hot mustard?
Ladies and gentlemen, boxed for your blogging entertainment, I give you…the final Panda Express meal!
I really hate the sloppy way this stuff looks when you open the lids.
Here’s the entrees all plated up, let’s take our first and last bites from Panda Express!
First Bites
Beijing Beef: Like everything I’ve had here, this was bland and devoid of any kind of taste. Not horrible but nothing to ever come back for.
Wok-Seared Steak & Chicken: Dot and Ditto to the review from above.
Panda Rating (1-4)
Two Pandas, kind of a generous rating, but since it’s the end of this journey I thought I’d be nice.
Even this fucking Chocolate Chunk Cookie is bland! It was like eating soft cardboard and there was no chocolate taste to it at all!
Well now, this is one fortune that will actually come true!
Goodbye Panda Express, I’d like to say this was fun, but it was really just an exercise of blandness.
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One Day At Panda Express
One day? Try eleven fucking weeks! Sheesh!
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